Don’t ask me how, but I stumbled into a career in an industry that doesn’t really afford me much free time. As much as I want to, advertising account managers or entertainment marketing managers don’t really get to go out of town on a whim every weekend (but hey if this is you, congrats, my dwindling social life commends you). So when a long weekend presented itself and it turned out that a couple others of my good friends were free, we took the chance to flit off to Batangas for a little R&R… and much to my dismay, a little mountain hiking.
Here’s the thing – the hiking wasn’t really my idea. I don’t really climb things. I’m small. I’m afraid of tall things. I’d much rather dive or snorkel or play sports that involve balls. But I’d never done it before and I was told that Talamitam was a good mountain for beginners so I sucked it up and went along, promising myself that I wouldn’t be a whiny little betch.
I have to admit, the climb really wasn’t all that bad. The views were amazing, and the weather was cooperative (meaning the sun stayed away and the wind was cold – just the way I like it) and it was a wonderful opportunity to reconnect with my camera.
This is still one of my favorite sets of photographs, and I can’t believe it took me about 10 months to write about them.
The thing with this set is, every time I come across it, it reminds me that once upon a time, I wanted to be a photographer. I’m not saying that’s dead, just… in a coma. I got into advertising as a means to an end – a job/career that grants me stability so that I can save up enough to be comfortable yet still pursue my passions. It was a good, mature plan. But lately I’ve realized that my means to an end has become my reality, and it’s getting to that point that I’m actually starting to like it. So it’s not a bad thing, really, but it’s hard to accept that something I used to want with every fiber of my being is now something that I don’t even think of anymore. Did I just learn to cope, because it turns out – hey! – I’m pretty good at marketing? Is this growing up? Or am I just being a vapid middle class yuppie whining about her life?
Because the thing is, I like my job now. I like where I’m at career-wise. I’ve been having a ton of fun the past couple of months, and the financial stability is definitely something I feel like I worked so hard for and therefore deserve. So where do I go from here? Sometimes I still see the end goal I started out with, but sometimes I feel like every single thing that I’ve experienced in the past couple of years is telling me that I am meant for something else completely different.
So far, in the past 7-something years of being in my 20s, I’ve only come to realize one universal truth: we’re aaaall faking it. And if faking it has gotten me this far, I guess it won’t hurt to see where it takes me from here.